Jenny this one is for you.As many of you know, I am a successful matchmaker, advice giver, and love advisor. A dear friend called me last night for some advice, her concern about the first date was not uncommon. Her question," How do you know the guy is interested in you after the first date?" (please note this advice applies to men also).
I will begin by saying this, never ever ever kiss after the first date(unless by some chance you have been friends for months, and decided a date was needed to seal the deal, there are no other exceptions!) Building up a little desire to see what happens on the second or third date is ideal, and most women are not comfortable kissing after a first date anyhow. Below is a list, in which I will start with #1(the least interest in a second date) thru #9( the most interested in a date).
#1 They open their car door, door in one hand and keys in the other. They quickly say "thanks", and jump in the car. hahaha oh suck
#2 They stand more than 5 ft away from, and without moving their legs forward...extend a hand shake and a "thank you".
#3 They quickly go in for the side hug(not face to face), releasing as quick and say "Thanks again, see ya around." Ouch!
#4 The church hug. (Getting warmer but no cigar!) Both people extend one arm wrapping lightly atop one shoulder, their butt or mid section is at least 2ft distance away from each other.
#5 They quickly go for a two arm hug, however, in under 2 seconds they are patting your back. Like a coach does to his boyz after the game! Ewh, a definite sign they enjoyed the night, but dont want to see you again.
#6 A two arm hug with a decent hold embrace, 3 seconds or more, and they release with no pat-pat. Good stuff, they are thinking about asking you out again.
#7 A two arm hug/ linger longer around 4-5 seconds. Yep, they will call.
#8 A two arm hug/linger longer, plus a quick gaze as you pull out of hug. Fantastic, they were more than into you, and are likely gonna talk a bit longer and go in for a second hug. Yes, they likely want more than just 1 more date.
#9 All of #8 plus they wont let you leave until they have confirmed the next time you are available! This one makes me smile every time! Undoubtly, there is chemistry and interest there!
Happy dating!
***** Ladies, please note. Even though you may have asked him on the first date, DO NOT ask him for the second. Men like to be HUNTERS, they like to have some control of their destiny, so please please let them. Additionally, you dont want to start second guessing if he would've ever pursued you. Because after he asks you on the next one, that settles the guessing.******
3 comments:
This is great advice. When I met Christie, she wanted a kiss after the first date, but I was taught never to start the physical portion of the relationship on the first date. Some people believe in saving that part until after the proposal, or even until the honeymoon.
There is one factor, though, which skews all results. Engineer. These men with degrees in engineering, and sometimes also in the hard sciences, are oblivious to social graces and social norms. Some of these men have no clue and never will. One case in point is a professor of mine. When he was younger, in college, a woman tried three times, each a month or two apart, to flirt with him. He had no idea. Thankfully, one of his more observant friends told him flat out, "You know that girl has been trying to flirt with you." He asked her out and they got married. So please, when dealing with men studying to be engineers and scientists, check with their friends to see if they are even aware of women. Be blunt with their friends, and you might just get through to us.
hahha dave I love it! You know, that is true seems like guys heavily involved in science usually dont get married until their 30's because they dont have a clue! Example: Went to a Mid-singles conference 2 years ago. I met over 34 men during a speed dating session. Would you believe only 11 were not engineers?! Its true!
I love it....maybe you should write a book! Afraid I failed a little. Tony kissed me on the first date (shame) and I liked it! Married 2 months later.....
But hey, we are OLD and don't have a lot of time....
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